I had an epiphany today as I cooked dinner. I was thinking about my life, my blog, my husband (who was in the bathroom, cutting his hair & kept calling me to check it out), my purpose…. and as I was trying to figure out how to work out this blogging thing (because it takes me a LOOONG time to write a typical post), it dawned on me: It’s the SMALL VICTORIES in life that make me a Striving Wife!!
Basically, I’ve been struggling about what to blog about for some time now… I’ve been reading tons of books about marriage and being a wife, (which are great!) trying to write about the things in there that strike me as “WOW”…. HUGE areas that need to change …. but, while the books and the information are good and helpful, overall it’s been feeling dry. Boring. Lifeless. It makes me feel like I’m painting the picture that marriage is a struggle, the constant battle of my flesh versus my spirit, with my husband thrown in the middle.
Okay, maybe that’s the case for some marriages… but I’m guessing that that’s NOT the norm for most of us out there. I think most of us have GREAT marriages, of course with some room for improvement!
So, it got me thinking…. most days, I’m not struggling to overcome some obstacle that’s threatening the well-being of my marriage. (Even if it seems that way, since those are the topics of most of my blog posts.) Most days, Jason & I blissfully go through our day, laughing, talking, cuddling, checking our Facebook/blog/Twitter/email… And on these days, where there are no battles of will or tearful meltdowns and all hormones are in check, I have absolutely no clue as to what I should blog about!!!
My thoughts are, “Well, what am I striving about today? Nothing really… Hmm. No blog post today I guess.” Or, I’ll go dig out one of my books and try to pull something from there. The result: either no blog post, or 2 hours worth of research and writing to come up with something which might be good. Or not.
This brings me back to my epiphany… I NEED TO CELEBRATE THE SMALL VICTORIES! I NEED TO BLOG ABOUT THE SMALL AREAS WHERE I STRIVE AND SUCCEED!!
I am not necessarily a striving wife just because I overcame a large anger/pride/etc issue… I am a striving wife because I DAILY die to myself, DAILY make small sacrifices, and DAILY submit in various areas to my husband.
Think about your daily routine…. and then commend yourself for all the ways that you have shown yourself to be a striving wife TODAY!! It’s easy… just list out the little things you did today for your husband! I’ll start…
Today, I was a striving wife because…
- I picked up the empty trash containers & brought them inside (usually his job) because I knew Jason was running late to his 2nd job.
- I picked out a new recipe that I thought he would like, and cooked it for dinner.
- I paused in my dinner preparations to give my husband my undivided attention when he needed help cutting his hair.
- I gladly finished doing the dishes after Jason got most of the way through them.
- I told him several times how cute he looked.
- I did the laundry.
Simple things….. yet I did them all with a heart to please both God and my husband. Other things that might make you a striving wife:
- Spending extra time with your in-laws.
- Cutting excess spending to save money.
- Staying up later than your normal bedtime to talk, cuddle, or be intimate with your husband.
- Getting up earlier than necessary to cook breakfast for your husband or family.
- Praising your husband’s efforts at work or throughout the home.
- Going to see an action movie, even when you’d rather see a chick flick.
Simple things… yet they make a world of difference throughout your day!! Don’t be discouraged if you get into a fight with your husband, or seem to be struggling submitting in one area or another… be ENCOURAGED because there are so many OTHER areas that you are fabulous in!!
So, I would like to encourage you in this: Look at the little things you do throughout the day to please your husband, and try to add more in. Little by little, they will all add up to you being an EXCELLENT WIFE!!!
Keep on striving!!!
Heather 
PS - I’d love to hear the areas you strive daily in! Leave a comment, stories, prayer requests, or anything else, below!!
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November 3rd, 2008 at 10:09 pm
Thank you so much honey for all that you do. It’s the little things that make you so wondeful and the HUGE things that just make me love you even more!
Keep Striving!!!
Jason
November 4th, 2008 at 7:50 am
Aww Jason what a great comment and what a great Blog.
your right heather so many times we dont see the little things because were trying to take on the bigger issues.
some areas for me are
- occasionally watching football endlesly,so andy can enjoy the games
- giving andy a massage at night when hes had a hard day
- waking up at 6:30 to make his lunch for the day
- taking the baby off his hands so he can relax a bit when he eat dinner.
Its not that hard and makes all the world to him so why not…haha
November 4th, 2008 at 5:50 pm
Great post! Marriage is mostly made up of little daily things and decisions we make. Both things we can DO to be a better or more loving spouse and things we can decide NOT to do that take away from the other ones happiness. Giving ourselves up in little things many many times a day for someone else is a huge thing! It all adds up, doesn’t it? Thanks for openly sharing your journey!
blessings,
Melissa
November 7th, 2008 at 2:24 pm
Thanks Jason… I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!
Kelly, I love your last line… “It’s not that hard and makes all the world to him so why not” < — SO TRUE!! It really isn’t hard, and the benefits definitely outweigh anything else!
Melissa, it’s so true about the little things, both that we do or don’t do! Thanks for commenting!
By the way…. if anyone wants that recipe, be sure to sign up for my newsletter, and you’ll get to make an AMAZING recipe for YOUR hubby!
Keep on Striving,
Heather
November 7th, 2008 at 2:51 pm
I think you’re absolutely right about the little things!! They’re as important as the big things because they all add up. Don’t be afraid to tell us those little, seemingly unimportant things in your blog because it’s an encouragement to us! It’s hard some days to concentrate on all the huge ways we need to strive as a wife. But knowing that a little gesture can make a big difference is encouraging because it’s an achievable goal.
Your blog today was not “dry”! It was very yummy, the way that recipe sounds!!
Rachel
xxxxx
November 17th, 2008 at 8:30 pm
you are totally right, Heather! thanks for the reminder! one of my small victories thoday was planning meals for the rest of the week using groceries we already have, so I do not have to spend any more grocery money until just before Thanksgiving (hubby was stressing about the budget this weekend)
November 17th, 2008 at 10:28 pm
Heather, See, you did it. You came up with a great post. It is so true that it’s the little things in life that make it enjoyable, peaceful, and loving. Those little things speak volumes more than the big things because they come from a heart of consistent care. Blessings to you…Lynn
December 4th, 2008 at 8:19 pm
I am looking at close to 40 years of marriage and it has been filled with so many tiny victories, that we have officially at last declared we have won the war
We always try to look beyond the trivial things of the day…and keep our eyes on the greater prize.
Looks like the both of you are striving for blissfully sweet success~and I believe you will achieve it!
(super thanks for the chicken rcp. we are poultry framers so thats great!)
December 4th, 2008 at 8:20 pm
LOL LOL
Not framers
Farmers…..
( I can’t type) LOL
May 6th, 2009 at 3:16 pm
That was great Heather, a great reminder that the small things matter and are worth it! The recipe looks great I’ll have to gather the ingredients to try it!
Thanks again for the encouragement. Hope you are feeling better today.
June 5th, 2009 at 7:56 am
Hey Heather Great post as always, but If i can encourage you for a moment this is a great lesson to new moms or moms in general when your little precious Marshmallow comes remember that it’s the small victories that are the most important in the beginning. Especially when you have a new born! As I approach this aspect of my life yet again I strive to remember its the little things that sometimes are the greatest victories! Some mommy’s of a new baby, struggle with taking a shower other struggle with trying to get it all done. All different kinds of things, but the bottom line is the smallest of Victories are sometimes the most victorious! Does that make any sense?? Thanks for the reminder as always!
Love and Prayers
stacey