Heather Marshall on September 9th, 2008

So, it’s been a while since my last “real” post, as I’m trying to juggle my new fall schedule.  I started back at school, where I’m an aide in a special ed class.  It’s not hard work, but I don’t really get much of a break, especially for blogging.  Hopefully I’ll get into a good routine, especially because I want to jump into my next series!!

I was cleaning the other day, which gave me some time to think… and I was struck with the inspiration for my new series.  Oddly enough, it has nothing to do with cleaning. Instead, it’s going to be about the Gracious Wife.

When I think of someone who is full of grace, I think of a ballet dancer.  Fortunately, that’s not the “grace” that I’m referring to.  I’ll use the definitions of grace that I got from www.thefreedictionary.com…

Grace, n. a sense of propriety and consideration for others;  a disposition to kindness and compassion; a disposition to be generous or helpful; goodwill; mercy; clemency; a favor rendered by one who need not do so; indulgence; kind or polite

Why is grace so important?  Other than the fact that it is by God’s grace that we are saved (and not of any work that we do), God also calls us to pass that grace onto others. (1 Peter 4:10) I fully believe that being a Godly and Biblical wife means that we are called to be a Gracious Wife.

In this series, I will be looking at several specific contrasts to the Gracious Wife, but first we must define what a Gracious Wife looks like!

The definition of Grace somewhat gives it away, but let’s look closer at it.

* a sense of propriety and consideration for others

  • A Gracious Wife is polite, and puts others first!

* a disposition to kindness and compassion; a disposition to be generous or helpful; mercy

  • The Bible says to Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:32)

These characteristics not only will benefit your husband, but also your kids, extended family, friends, church members, co-workers, and people you may not even like very much.

Think about it…  think about your responses in various situations.  Do you respond graciously? Or do you respond with sarcasm, defensiveness, or anger?  Do you talk about your husband in a demeaning way to your girlfriends, or do you talk respectfully about him?  Do you hold a grudge against your husband when he does something wrong, or do you forgive him and move on?

Let’s move out of the realm of your marriage… You are tired, but your kid needs help with his homework. Out of compassion and consideration, do you help? Or do you leave him to fend for himself?  That might be an easy answer…. let’s go deeper.  Your co-workers are gossiping about your boss… does your graciousness win out, or do you give in to the lure of the gossip?  A friend “uses” you, and you so want to be bitter at her… do you forgive and continue to extend kindness? Or do you stay angry and lash out with unkind words?

I pray that I remain gracious, even when circumstances seemingly “justify” sinful behavior.  I pray that I am a woman of Grace, regardless of how others’ treat me.  I pray that I exude God’s grace, which He lavishly bestowed upon ME.  Out of love and honor for our Savior, let’s pour out grace on others… let’s strive to be Gracious Wives!!

Now here are some questions for you….  When do you find it most difficult to be gracious?  What do you do in those situations?  What characteristic(s) seem to come out most frequently when you’re NOT being gracious?   I’d love to hear what you think!  Leave a comment below…

Keep on striving!!

Heather :)

PS - Check back soon for the next parts, as we contrast the Gracious Wife with characteristics such as sarcasm and anger, among others!

PPS - Have you signed up for the Striving Wives newsletter yet?  Don’t miss out! Be the first to get important blog updates, contest announcements, and hear about freebies!!!  Sign up right here….

Related posts:

  1. Some Final Thoughts on Being a Gracious Wife
  2. The Gracious Wife versus The Sarcastic Wife
  3. The Gracious Wife versus The Nagging Wife
  4. The Gracious Wife versus The Angry Wife
  5. What Makes a Good Wife - Part 3 - Worldly Wife vs Biblical Wife

3 Responses to “What Defines a Gracious Wife?”

  1. “a favor rendered by one who need not do so” - I love this definition. This is something the Lord has been teaching me recently - extend grace even when he doesn’t deserve it or when I don’t have to. Even better, extend grace ESPECIALLY when he doesn’t deserve it or when I don’t have to.

    “Where sin increased, grace increased all the more” - Romans 5:20

    I am to forfeit my right to stay angry or hold something over his head, just as Christ forfeited his rights on the cross for me.

    I’m looking forward to the rest of your series!

  2. Heather - Love this new series…I am printing it out so I can think on it while I am having lunch! What a blessing you are!!! Love Ya!


  1. The Gracious Wife versus The Sarcastic Wife

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